postpartum depression RSS

anxiety, birth, Donna Bruschi, empowerment, fear, home, homebirth, midwife, mothering, postpartum depression, pregnancy, safety, VBAC -

Twins always arrive early. Right?

That's An Old Wive's Tale.

I look at my striated belly with the doughy soft puckers that have never flattened back into that gentle swell that used to be my belly.

If my twins had been early, I would not have this. At 36 weeks, my belly was a gigantic, unblemished orb. I had 1 or 2 stripes at 37 weeks.

Ar 39 weeks, my midwife and I were laughing at the incredible, angry red vortex radiating from my bellybutton. The stripes were something out of a science fiction story. Like a chick pecking the egg from the inside, it looked like my stomach was getting ready to rip open.

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Donna Bruschi, emotions, friends, imperfection, kindness, meltdowns, new baby, parenting, postpartum depression, sick, sleep -

"I was the loneliest person in the world. My baby and I were spiraling down into a living hell..."

My baby cried all the time, refusing to be held by anyone but me. I cried all the time. The pain of the surgery amplified by cracked, burning nipples and the agony of frustration, sadness and betrayal.

And then it got worse.

 

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